Blog@Mindfulness and Self-Compassion

Compassion is fundamental to our basic nature and enhances our everyday experience of being human as we cultivate the three flow of receiving and giving compassion to others and to ourselves, promoting well-being, resilience and social connection.

The practice of the self-compassion break is a simple way to introduce more kindness to yourself in a stressful moment when you need it most.

Our most important relationship is the one we are having with our self. We can give to ourselves the acceptance and the affection that we are so much wanting to receive from others. And when we offer ourselves kindness and love our life is changed for the better! Befriending ourselves is the practice of self-compassion.

“Compassion is aimed at the alleviation of suffering – that of others or ourselves – and can be ferocious as well as tender” Kristin Neff.

The “not being enough” stories are actually destructive, sabotaging our best efforts. Instead, we can adopt a practice of choosing again, to accept ourselves okay as we are. We are perfectly imperfect! Work in progress! Rather than focus on what we are not, we can begin to appreciate what is good in us, as starting blocks to improve.

I have a confession to make. There was many Christmas in my life where, instead of being so “perfectly” happy, I was so “perfectly” unhappy. My expectations were way too high! I had this fantasy that Christmas “should” bring me “perfect” happiness. I was convinced that everybody else was having a “perfect” time at Christmas except me. Years after years, I felt so hurt; while holding down to my "unrealistic" expectations. Christmas was always so “ordinary”. However over time, fortunately, I changed my mind. I gave myself the gift of expecting less and appreciating more. And in so doing Christmas became so much more joyful.

Relationships are at the center of our life: whether it’s our spouse, children, parents, co-workers, clients, patients, students or customers. Our greatest moment of joy or pain are in our relationships with others. Developing mindful awareness with self-compassion can help us create more understanding, harmony and love in our relationships.

As a professional, it can be difficult at times to maintain our enthusiasm and dedication for a higher standard of service delivery in the face of increasing demands and pressures in our work place. You probably have entered the profession with a passion for helping others, but years later your compassion may have faded a little, experiencing more fatigue. Sometimes, we may grow resentful at the inadequacies of the organizations. Burnout can present itself in various ways; maybe feeling less effective, questioning, doubting ourselves, becoming less tolerant of our colleagues, feeling isolated or dissatisfied.